Everybody knows that the tastiest Dog Cock Frittata is made with meat that is fresh off the bone. There is no better way to do this than to harvest the cock whilst the dog is still alive, preferably with his tackle well out. I've found a good trick is to do your cooking at about 4 in the afternoon, when some attractive lady dogs are being walked past your window. If you're not fortunate enough to live in a busy dog thoroughfare, then just get some dog porn printed up and the job's a good 'un. You get the cleanest cut with some good garotte wire, you can get it for about three quid at Woolworths. Just get under the dog, have your arms in position, and at the opportune moment, whip your hands round and pull tight in one swift movement. Chop immediately and throw straight in the pan. Seasoned chefs will use the ancient Errol Flynn method of using their teeth. And that's how you'll be served cock at Casa Corin, probably with bite marks, they give the dish a lovely rustic finish. Buon Appetito!